


We'll Get Lost Together

by pandorabox82



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-09
Updated: 2014-05-10
Packaged: 2018-01-24 03:11:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 14,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1589531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandorabox82/pseuds/pandorabox82
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave was surprised at her return and how vulnerable she looked at the moment she stepped off the elevator. And then he realized he'd gone and fallen in love with her all over again. How will she react to his concern?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He had gotten to work much earlier than normal, and found himself with time to make the perfect cup of coffee. Adding another small spoon of sugar, Dave mixed it with the community spoon and sipped at it. "Wonderful," he whispered and exited the coffee nook. As he began to make his way to his office something caught his eye and he looked towards the elevators. The doors opened and she stepped out. The first thing he noticed was the look on her face.

She looked scared, like a deer having somehow gotten lost in a maze and finding no way of escape. Dave felt his heart break in that moment and he swallowed another sip of coffee to keep himself from reaching out to Erin Strauss. There was no way she would accept his overture, not at a time like this. Instead, he stopped and watched her progress towards her office, out of his line of sight.

Shaking his head, he went up to his office and tried to concentrate on his work. He found that he had little focus, his mind constantly returning to Erin. She'd had a rough time lately, and he admired her for coming back at all. He pushed his chair back and stood, looking out over the bullpen. His team members were joking and laughing, as if they didn't realize Erin was back, was trying to return to normalcy.

"That's it, I have to go see her," he muttered and he opened his door. The others looked up at him and he half-smiled back, taking the stairs quickly before making his way out to the hall. Turning to the right, he covered the distance between them as fast as he could without getting out of breath.

Helen, her assistant, looked up at him, a quizzical look on her face. "Can I help you, Agent Rossi?" she said softly, staring him down.

"I need to see Erin. Is she with anyone right now?" Helen shook her head and he smiled widely at her. "Excellent." He went over to the door and was inside before she could say anything to stop him.

Looking around the room, he took in the fact that every blind was closed, keeping out the light and blocking out the watchful eyes of all who would enter the outer office. He heard Erin before he saw her and he turned his head to look at her, sitting on her couch, crying. He cleared his throat and she looked up at him, wiping her tears away hastily. "David, I didn't hear you come in."

He sat next to her and she sighed lightly. "How are you doing, Erin?"

"Oh, just peachy, can't you tell?"

He carefully let his arm come to rest around her shoulders and she surprised him by leaning into the embrace, resting her head against his chest. "You know you could never lie to me, Erin. So, spill. What has you crying this morning?"

"Everything." She stopped and took a deep breath. "Why did you come here?"

"I saw the lost look you had in your eyes this morning, babe." He heard her slight laugh at the endearment and rubbed her arm. "Is there anything I can do to help you out?"

"Kill Alan?" He shook his head. "Damn. Can I ask you to be a friendly face, then? I really need to have someone here who will just let me be and support me. I don't think I can do this on my own." She began to cry a little harder and he lifted his hand to press her head to his chest, stroking her hair as she poured out her emotions on his shirt. "Did you know he used my rehab stint as a way to get custody of our youngest? I mean, she is sixteen, she can make her own choices, but the judge felt it in her best interest to live with Alan."

"And she doesn't want to see you."

"None of them do. It sucks when you're a failure, David."

He leaned back and looked at her. "Erin Strauss, if you talk in such a defeated manner, nothing in your life will change. Tell me one thing in your life that does not make you a failure."

She tried to smile up at him, but her lips quivered too much. "I suppose not tasting a drop of alcohol in one hundred twenty days is not a failure."

"No, that takes amazing strength of will. I'm proud of you." This pulled a real smile from her and he reached up to rub his thumb across her cheek. "I bet you're feeling a little overwhelmed at being back without an old crutch to fall back on. I'm going to take its place, and be the crutch you can lean on. We'll get lost together, Erin."

"That sounds wonderful, it really does." She leaned into him once more, curling her hand in his shirt. "I feel a little like a fish out of water, being back after so long."

"Just try and make it through today. We could head out for supper at six."

"I would really like that, David."

He grinned and stood up. "I'll hold you to it, then. See you at six." He was surprised when she stood up and hugged him tightly. Hesitantly, he embraced her in return, rubbing her back softly. When she was ready, she released him and took a seat behind her desk, effectively dismissing him.

Whistling under his breath, he made his way back to the bullpen. Morgan motioned him over to Reid's desk and he ambled up, leaning against it. "So, did you hear that Strauss is finally back? I hope that this doesn't mean that everything goes to hell once again. It was so nice with her gone."

Dave felt his eyes narrow slightly as he looked at the younger man. "I'm glad that she's back. She needs to get her feet under her again. Now, is there a new case to brief today?"

JJ nodded, frowning at him. "Yeah, we picked up a consult for the Lincoln police department. Just let me round up Hotch and Garcia." He nodded and went up to his office, grabbing his iPad off the desk and staring out the window at the street below. Morgan knew what Erin had been through, so his casual disparagement was disheartening. A soft knock on his door had him turning around and he saw JJ standing there. "So, what's up with you this morning?"

"People just need to realize that Erin has been through a lot more than what shows here at work." She raised an eyebrow. "Look, I know none of you really like her, but she needs our support at a time like this. You can help me lead the team."

"Really, David? You want me to be kind to the woman who gave me up to the State Department?"

"Yes, Jen. You told us yourself that it was above her pay grade, and that was the truth. She was backed into a corner and with everything that was going on, she gave in to find some sense of stability."

JJ sighed and he knew he had won her over. "I did hear scuttlebutt that she and her husband had split." He nodded. "What about her kids? I know she has to have them, since she did seem concerned about how much time I spend away from Henry."

"He got custody." He saw her eyes darken slightly with pain and nodded at her.

"That sucks."

"I know. So, do you think that you can be kind, even to one such as her?" She nodded and he smiled. "Good, then let's get to that consultation."

Once more, Dave found it hard to concentrate as he listened to Penelope lay out the case. As the others discussed theories, he zoned out, wondering what Erin was doing at the moment. They worked all the way through lunch, and Anderson brought in an order from Jimmy John's for them. Finally, at three, they had a profile all squared away and he was able to escape back to his office.

His message light was blinking when he got back there and as he sat behind his desk, he pressed the play button, listening to Erin's voice spill out from the speaker. "Hi, Dave, I have a bit of a headache, so I'm heading home right now. I'll make us supper, if you still want to spend time with me. It should be ready about six. I hope this doesn't disappoint you. Let me know one way or the other, okay?"

She had hung up without even saying goodbye and that made him smile. Quickly, he looked up her number and dialed it. She picked up on the third ring. "Hello, beautiful. What are you making me for supper?"

"Dave! I thought I'd make us something simple, like a pot pie. Or did you have something else in mind?"

"Chicken pot pie sounds amazing at the moment, Erin."

"Good, because it's already almost put together. See you in a few hours." Once more, she hung up without preamble and he stared the phone. Chuckling, he got down to work for the few remaining hours left in his day and promptly at five, he stood up and turned out his lamp, exiting the room.

"Where are you headed off to so early?" He looked over at Hotch and shrugged.

"Don't you think you should be getting home, too? You did say that your date with Beth went great." Dave pointedly ignored the question he'd been asked and Hotch shrugged in return.

"She has some function at the museum tonight, and Jessica has Jack. We're training tomorrow morning, though, so I'm going to get a good night's sleep."

"Well, have fun with that. See you tomorrow." Dave went out to the elevator and pressed the button, waiting for it to come. Thankfully, Hotch didn't join him and he got on the elevator alone. By the time he reached his car, he found himself full of nervous energy. After starting his car, he turned up the radio to drown out his thoughts.

The porch light was on when he got to Erin's house. He parked in front of the garage door and took a deep breath. Before he was ready, the front door opened and she appeared, haloed by light. Smiling, he got out and went up to her. "You're a little early, the food won't be ready for another thirty minutes or so."

"I had to get out of that place." She led him inside and took his coat, hanging it on the tree next to the door. "We could talk until it's time to eat."

"I think I'd like that." She held out her hand to him, and he clasped it, letting her take him into the living room. They sat on a low couch and she once more surprised him by curling her legs under her body and leaning against him. "Today is day one hundred twenty."

It took him a moment to process what she meant. "That's wonderful, Erin. Four months is quite the achievement."

She brought her finger up to his lips. "No, we count by days. Anything more than a day is too long a time to think of, you know?" Slowly, he nodded. "Can I tell you a secret?"

"Of course you can. I'll even keep it for you."

She just rolled her eyes as she shook her head. "I do not miss my ex-husband nearly as much as I thought I would."

"I never missed ex-wife numbers two and three, either. It was like waking up from a very bad dream."

"That's good to know. I want to pick up where we left off, all those years ago."

Dave felt the air being sucked from his lungs as he leaned back to look at her. "What?"

"I was wrong to run away, back then. I let your reputation scare me off and I took the safe option in Alan. We're not supposed to begin relationships until we've made it a year sober, but I found that, when the cravings got too bad in rehab, I would think of you, and that would chase them away. I know this is sudden, and you probably want nothing to do with me after everything I've done to you and your team over the years. But Dave, I want to try to find what we had back then."

He felt his face relax into a stupid grin as he wrapped an arm around her waist. "Tabula rasa, Erin?"

"Totally. Well, except for the happy moments we had back then." She sighed softly and he pulled her close. "I cannot remember the last time I felt this free, Dave."

He rubbed her shoulder gently and she arched into the touch. "How long has it been since you had someone touch you?"

"Too long." The buzzer on the oven went off and they both released a frustrated breath. "But I want to know more about the you of today before we do any heavy petting."

"And I want to know more about the you of today, as well. I'm not quite the lothario I once was, Erin. If we're to make this work, I'm going to be a one woman man."

"And I'm going to be a one man woman." They stood and she stepped forward, hugging him tightly. "But I am still going to surprise you," she murmured before standing on her tiptoes and kissing him sweetly.

Laughing, he slung an arm around her waist and they went into the kitchen. Suddenly, his life had a sunnier outlook.


	2. Chapter 2

Two weeks had passed since their supper together. Though they had called each other almost every evening, due to their schedules they hadn't been able to find any time to be together. March came in like a lion with a fierce thunderstorm as they landed after another rough case and he sighed as he stared out the window.

As if knowing his discontent, his phone rang the moment they touched down and he pulled it out. "Are you home yet?" she asked without preamble.

"We just landed. What's wrong?"

"I just got finished fighting with my daughter. And I really want to take a drink right now. I called my sponsor, but she's not answering."

"Where are you?"

"At home. Hurry, please?"

"Certainly. I'll be there as soon as I can be." He heard her sigh as she hung up and he met Aaron's eye. "What?"

"New girlfriend?"

"Sort of. I need to get back as soon as possible, so let's get moving." He narrowed his gaze and Aaron nodded. They filed off the plane and he jogged over to his car. Waving to the others, he sped out of the lot and drove to Erin's. The drive took entirely too long and he jogged up to her door the moment he was out of her car.

"You're here," she whispered as she threw open the door.

"I am." Erin launched herself into his arms, embracing him tightly as she burst into tears. "Hush, Erin, everything will be okay." He kissed her forehead and led her inside. Somehow, he found his way to the living room and got them settled on the sofa. Her cries showed no signing of easing and he rocked her back and forth, murmuring soft platitudes on her ear as he rubbed her back.

Finally, her shoulders stopped shaking and she pulled back from him. "Thank you for coming so soon." She reached up and cupped his face. "I just feel so lost right now."

"What happened?"

She sighed and burrowed into him once more. "Mary got upset by the fact that I'm moving on from her father dumping me. She thinks I should pine after him until I figure out a way to get him back. I don't want that."

"What do you want?" he asked tenderly, running his fingers through her hair.

"To move on. We never belonged together, Dave, I see that now. I should have trusted my heart and ran towards you. But I didn't, and now I have all this time to make up for, and I have to try to keep my children happy, and balance work in there somehow. I'm being pulled in three directions and I know that if there was even one of those sample size bottles of alcohol here, I would be drinking it. Help me?"

He nodded and laid back on the sofa, repositioning her body so that she stretched out over him. Erin rested her head on his heart, and he could tell she was listening to his heartbeat. Carolyn had often done the same when she was upset, and he let her be for a few moments. "Erin, what do you need me to do?"

"Listen to me?"

"That I can easily do."

"So, my hands shake now. The moment I start craving, they shake so badly that I drop things. I've broken four glasses, my grandmother's vase that I inherited, two hand mirrors, and my phone so far."

"So, you're not safe around the breakables. That's good to know."

She giggled softly, curling her hand in his shirt. "And then you go and do that. You always know how to make me laugh. Laughter makes me feel better, you know."

"Then I'll have to think of ways to make you smile and laugh more often." Feeling bold, he ran his hand down her back to cup her rear. She squirmed a bit, but didn't pull away and he leaned down to kiss the top of her head. "Are you?"

"No, not tonight, I'm sorry. I don't mind you touching me, above the clothes, but it's only March. It hasn't been three full months yet since I got out of rehab. I need to be on a little firmer ground before I can even consider letting you feel me up. And I really want you to feel me up. Are you willing to wait?"

"For you? I will wait as long as it takes you to be ready."

"I was hoping I would hear that." She lifted her head and closed her eyes, waiting. Slowly, he lowered his face and covered her lips with his, kissing her gently. He could feel the sigh that stole through her body and smiled. "I love…this."

"I love this, too."

"Good. Will you stay the night? I don't think that I can be alone at the moment." He nodded and she smiled, laying her head back down on his chest. "Did you bring pajamas? I'm afraid I don't have anything left over from Alan."

"My undershirt and boxers will work fine, won't they?"

"Yes." Erin began to play with the buttons on his shirt. "Aaron left me quite a bit of paperwork to catch up on. I don't know if I should thank him yet or not."

"Why would you thank him for extra work?"

"It's kept me occupied. Up until this fight, I've been too busy to think about drinking. Can you believe that I'm actually thankful for paperwork?"

"Then by all means, do mine as well. Or better yet, write my book for me. I have officially hit a brick wall on it." She giggled lowly and he rubbed her back. "I love to hear your laugh. You don't do it enough these days."

"There's a lot I don't do enough of these days. Chief amongst those is kissing you." She leaned up and covered his lips with hers. He responded, deepening the kiss and squeezing her ass roughly. "Oh, David, that feels wonderful, but no more, not tonight. I know, I'm giving off mixed signals, I'm sorry."

"Don't be, you need to heal first, the sex will come later." She nodded and yawned, her body arching into his as she stretched. "Well, it appears that is high time we got to bed." She nodded and stood up, holding out her hand to him. Together, they made their way upstairs and she pulled him into her room. "You can watch me undress," she murmured softly.

"Okay." He was surprised at her boldness, and he sat on the bed.

"Would you like navy blue or cream better?" she asked as she held up two different negligees against her body.

"Navy blue." She nodded and set it on the bed, stepping back to look at him, a nervous smile on her lips. "Do you want me to strip down first?"

"Oh, would you?" He nodded and stood back up, his hands making quick work of the buttons on his shirt. As he shrugged out of it, he undid the belt around his waist and pushed his jeans to the floor.

Erin waited for him to sit back down again before lifting her hands to the buttons on her blouse. He loved the creamy expanse of skin that she exposed as she parted the blouse, letting it fall off her shoulders to land on the floor. Then her skirt followed, and he was staring at her half-nude body. "I think you are more gorgeous today than you were all those years ago. How is that even possible that you can just grow in loveliness?"

"I don't know, Dave. How can you continue to grow more dapper?" He shrugged and she smiled, leaning forward to kiss him softly. He couldn't stop his hands from cupping her ass once more, loving how it felt. "And that definitely means the panties stay on under the negligee. I've given you boundaries, David. I need you to accept them or walk out that door."

He heard the change in her voice and brought his hands back down to rest in his lap. "I'm sorry, I'm good at pushing boundaries. I make no promises as to what my hands will do in sleep, though."

"Who said you were sleeping with me tonight?"

"I thought it was implied when you dragged me in here."

She smiled and reached behind her back, thrusting her chest out at him as she unhooked her bra. He licked his lips and she laughed lightly as she tugged off the bra, letting him take a good, long, look at her breasts. "I will allow you one kiss, above the waist, before I put my nightie on."

He nodded solemnly and leaned forward, keeping his hands in his lap. Dave bypassed her tempting nipples and instead placed a soft kiss on her heart. Sighing happily, Erin pulled on the negligee and pulled back the covers. "What side of the bed do I get?"

"The right. I've always slept closest to the door, it makes me feel safe." Dave nodded and moved over to his spot, sliding in. Erin joined him moments later, pulling up the covers around their shoulders before scooting over to his side. "I know you don't have clothes, but, would you spend the weekend here? I know it's going to be a bad one."

"All you had to do was ask. I would love a weekend to get lost in you."

"David."

"What? I want to get to know you better. And since you're not ready to be physically intimate, I need to be ready to be intimate on another level. That means getting lost in your past, your present, and where you see our future going."

She smiled and he loved the way it transformed her face. "Now that sounds truly wonderful." She yawned and then nuzzled her face in his shoulder. "I think I'm going to sleep now. The adrenaline from the fight has drained from my system." She quickly kissed his lips before turning over and wriggling back against him, tugging his arm around her waist.

"Good night then, Erin."

"Good night, Dave. I love you."

He was startled by her words and wanted to ask her if she meant them, but she was already asleep, her breaths steady and even. But she loved him. Even before they had made love, she was that certain of him in her life that she would tell him those words.

Softly, he stroked her hair, breathing in the delicate scent of her perfume. "Oh, Erin, I love you, too. I just wish you were awake to hear me say those words." He rubbed her stomach gently, knowing that he had no right to go any further than that. She arched into the touches and he felt himself lost in the beauty that was his Erin.

He couldn't seem to get to sleep, content to just watch her, the way she so trustingly slept in his arms, how relaxed she looked, the sweet and dreamy smile she wore. Finally, the fatigue of the day won out and he adjusted how he was holding her, wrapping both arms around her waist and tugging her back against him as he rested his chin atop her head. As he let his eyes close, he wondered when she would be ready to let him in a little more, to trust him with the wounds of her soul that had caused her to drink in the first place. And then he slept as well, his dreams filled with visions of them building a life together.


	3. Chapter 3

"We're coming home tomorrow, Erin. This case was so fucked up, you have no idea." He smiled a little as he heard her laugh gently.

"As opposed to the other cases you oversee? Ever since you returned, the cases have gotten more and more bizarre. You're a magnet for the weirdoes, it seems. Mary called me again. We were able to have a more civil conversation this time."

"That's wonderful, sweetheart. When we get back to the BAU, we're probably heading out for breakfast, and then calling it a day. Do you think you could beg off work early, and we could have lunch together, or something?"

He heard her breathing hitch, and wondered if he'd hear a yes or a no. "I probably can't get off that early, but I could leave at three. We could spend the afternoon together, walking around the park near my house?"

Dave relaxed back on the bed. "That sounds perfect. I'll meet you at your house around four, then? Let you get home and changed before we head out."

"Yes, I'll be looking forward to that all day tomorrow. Something to keep my mind off the cravings."

"Have you broken anything lately?"

"Yeah, another two glasses. Oh, and my favorite pair of reading glasses."

"I'll get you another pair."

"Not like these. They were perfect. Dark purple, with little rhinestones on the arms. And I'll never be able to find another pair just like them. And don't even say it, I know I'm whining. It's just, I loved them."

"Probably not as much as you love me."

"Well, there is that. I do love you, David."

"And I love you. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay." He heard her yawn as she hung up and then looked over at the clock. While it was only just past ten local time, it was after one back home. She was going to be exhausted in the morning, and it was really all his fault. He heard the door of the hotel room open and he looked up at Hotch. "Hey."

"Hey. How is she doing?"

"She broke her favorite reading glasses, which means I have to find her a replacement pair. We're heading out on a date tomorrow afternoon."

"And how much longer am I to keep your relationship under wraps?" he asked drolly as he took a seat on his bed.

"I don't know, Hotch. Probably a few more months, at least. She's skittish, worried about if she'll relapse, and we've been taking things so slow."

"Slow can be good."

"In this case, it is." He smiled as he stretched out on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. "I'll be glad when we're home. I miss her."

"And I miss Beth," Hotch countered, flopping back on the bed. "Do you want the light off now?"

"Yeah, I'll get it." He reached over and turned off the bedside lamp, not bothering to get under the covers as he fell asleep.

He found himself waking up the moment the alarm went off and he dressed quickly, stuffing his belongings back in his bag before turning on the overheard light. "Is it that time already?" Hotch moaned as he got up.

"Yeah, I'll meet you down in the lobby." The other man nodded and Dave slipped from the room, walking quickly to the large, airy, lobby. JJ was already there, texting someone, and he chuckled. "Who are you talking to this early?"

"Will. It's eight back home." He nodded and watched the others slowly trickle in. Finally, they were all assembled and he rode with Hotch and Morgan to the airfield. Once they were in the air, he began to text Erin.

_Hey, are you at work yet?_

_Got here about an hour ago. What do you need?_

_Why are you there so early?_

_Cravings were bad this morning. Work keeps them at bay. Are you in the air yet?_

_Uh huh. We'll be home in less than two hours. God, I love the jet._

_As much as you love me?_

_Never that much. See you soon._

_Not soon enough. Crap, getting an important call. Talk to you later._

He put his phone away and shook his head. The entire flight home, he found himself preoccupied with thoughts of his woman back home. At times, he caught JJ or Emily looking at him oddly and he just shrugged, not willing to give up who he'd been talking to.

"Ooh, Rossi has a girlfriend," JJ teased and he shot her a look. "Oh, and he doesn't want us asking questions. Are you ashamed of your girlfriend, Dave?"

"No. I just want to protect her from you vultures who will tell her every bad thing that I've done in the last five years." JJ and Emily giggled and he just rolled his eyes. "See, that right there tells me you two would end up saying something you shouldn't. You won't be meeting her for months, if ever."

"Ah, come on now, Dave. We aren't that bad." Emily got up and sat next to him, reaching for his phone.

"I don't think so." He tucked it into the pocket of his jeans, raising an eyebrow at her. "Go back to reading your book."

She nodded, pulling it out of her bag before settling back in the seat. Dave smiled as he watched the sky outside grow brighter with every passing moment. Finally, they landed and made their way back to the campus. Penelope met them by the elevators, and he heard JJ extended to her an invitation to breakfast, which she quickly declined. Morgan stayed behind as well, and so it was just JJ, Emily, Reid, and himself.

He gave one lingering look down the hall towards Erin's door, and her assistant waved cheerily at him. He waved back and caught Emily and JJ exchanging a look. "What?"

"So, you're dating Helen? What a great way to get dirt on Strauss! So, anything juicy you can tell us?" Emily asked eagerly, a wicked grin on her face.

Rossi felt himself glower at the woman and her face registered some of the shock she must have felt at his sudden change in demeanor. "I would think that after everything Strauss has been through in this past year you could show just a slight bit of compassion for the woman. Helen has told me nothing about her and I would not think to ask. If she wants privacy, she deserves it."

Emily nodded, looking somewhat mollified by his tirade, while JJ and Reid just looked at him like he had grown a third head. "Sorry, I didn't realize it was such a sore subject with you." He nodded and they continued on to their cars. He followed them to the diner nearby and parked under a shade tree. Finding himself no longer hungry, he ordered a cup of coffee and nursed it as he listened to the others talk and joke.

After an hour, he made his excuses and went home, taking a quick shower and changing into a fresh shirt and jeans. It was still slightly early, but he took the chance that Erin would have left work already and made his way over to her home.

Dave managed to arrive at her house moments after she did, watching her garage door close as he pulled into her drive. He parked behind her spot and went up to the porch, raising his hand to knock on the door as she opened it. "I thought I said three."

"I wanted to be early. Can you blame me?" She shook her head and stepped back, inviting him inside. "So, the rest of the team may think that I'm dating Helen."

"That will be news to her girlfriend. Why would they think that?"

"We waved to each other before I left this morning." She laughed lowly and then leaned forward, kissing him sweetly. "If I'd known that was all it took to get you to kiss me, I would have made you laugh the moment I stepped in the door."

Erin swatted his shoulder lightly. "Whatever. I am going to change, you can wait in the living room for me. I trust you can find your way."

He nodded and watched her disappear up the stairs, her hips swaying deliciously. Smiling, he went over to the living room and took a seat on her couch. Looking around the room, he saw that all traces of Alan had been removed, the remaining pictures just of her and her children. Getting up, he went over to the mantle, his eye caught by a small picture frame. He picked it up and recognized it as from the Christmas party twenty five years ago. Erin was cuddled up into him, smiling at the camera. He was looking down at her, a tender look on his face.

Hearing her footfalls behind him, he turned, still holding on to the photo. "I didn't remember this being taken."

"I kept it close to me, in my journals, to remind me of happier times, times I thought I had left behind as I turned myself into a person that I didn't like. I drank quite often to bury the guilt gnawing at me." She smiled at him gently. "I'm learning to move past that now. Are you ready to head out?"

He nodded and held out his hand. Erin clasped it tightly, leading him out the door. They turned left on the sidewalk and began walking to the small park that was just around the block. He could smell the sweet scent of water and smiled as she led them down a wooded path so that they could walk along the shoreline of the small lake. "Do you want to take off your shoes and dip your feet in the water?"

"It's March, David."

"And it's nearly eighty degrees out, bella."

"Well, you do have a point there. There's a dock just a little further down the way." He nodded and they continued on, stepping onto the dock and going to the very end. "So, tell me about this case," she said as she rolled up her pants and let her feet dangle in the water.

"She used to be a teacher. Two times, she seduced one of her students and then, when she got knocked up by the second one, she named him after the first student she destroyed. She messed up in the end, after Hotch shot her, calling the other kid by the first one's name. How can you ever forget something like that? Thinking the one person that you love most in this world considered you second rate to her "first love"." He shuddered and she leaned against him, wrapping an arm around his waist.

"That poor boy. Will he at least get custody of the baby?"

"I don't know, Erin."

"It's his child. He should be able to raise it." He felt her sigh deeply and he rubbed her arm vigorously.

"She's finally making her reappearance."

"Who?"

"The woman I fell in love with, the woman that's been kept under lock and key for a long time." She pulled away to look up at him, a slight smile dancing across her lips. "I knew she was in there, babe, I just wish it hadn't taken this mess to bring her back."

"This mess made me who I am. I've learned a lot."

"I can only imagine. Though, I am hoping that we can spar still." She nodded and kissed his cheek quickly before pushing him into the lake. The still freezing water cut to the bone and he shook his head. "It is on, Erin!" She shrieked slightly, scrambling to stand up, to move out of the range of his hands. He was too quick for her, though, and he grabbed hold of her ankle, pulling her closer and closer to the edge.

"Dave! Stop!" She was giggling a little, and he knew there was no real anger in her at the moment. Slowly, he inched her closer to the edge and she half-heartedly kicked out at him, catching him in the upper chest.

"Oh, for that, you are in big trouble, Erin." He tugged her the rest of the way off the dock and into the water, listening to her gasp as she splashed around.

"This is so cold!" she exclaimed as he helped her to shore. He gathered up their shoes and socks before they headed back home. "Thank God I have a Jacuzzi tub in the master bath, that should warm us up quickly enough."

He nodded, opening the door to the house and letting her lead him upstairs into the bathroom. While he started the hot water flowing, she stripped down, setting her clothes on the counter. "Erin?"

"You can't take a bath while dressed, David."

He couldn't ignore her logic and disrobed as well, putting his clothing atop hers. She stood before him, her hands anxiously rubbing against her thighs. "You're beautiful."

"Thank you. But, I hope you know this doesn't mean we're going to do anything other than wash each other." She wouldn't look at him and he caught the nervous way she bit her lip. Carefully, he lifted her chin so that he could look into her eyes.

"Erin, if I want this to last forever, and I really do, I want to be intimate with you, in every possible way. There's more to a relationship than sex." She nodded as her eyes filled with tears, and he kissed her slowly before helping her into the tub. Erin relaxed against him, letting him bring his hands up to cup her breasts.

"Mmm, that does feel nice, Dave," she murmured, her head coming to rest on his shoulder. Slowly, his thumbs brushed her nipples, teasing them to erect peaks. She squirmed against him, arousing him further, and he chuckled lowly.

"If you keep that up, honey, things are going to get too hot for the two of us rather quickly." She nodded, stilling her motions. He tightened his arms around her waist, trying desperately to find the calm of just holding her.

"Would you wash my hair for me? I swear I can smell the lake water still on me."

"Just hand me the shampoo and conditioner and I'll get you fixed up in no time." She handed him the bottles before ducking beneath the water, soaking her hair once more. She sighed as he massaged the shampoo in her hair, working up a good lather. "If I had known this brought you such pleasure, I'd have done it a long time ago."

"Just keep those magic fingers working, Dave." He laughed and rinsed the shampoo out, ready to begin with the conditioner. As he worked it in, he delighted in the soft moans she made, enjoying how much she was enjoying him. "I love moments like these."

"I do, too." He dropped a kiss on her shoulder and she arched back into him. He prayed that moments like these would never end.


	4. Chapter 4

"I hate people that hurt children," he muttered as Erin opened her door to him. It was later than he would normally come over, but he had to see her, had to hold her. He knew she would welcome him in, would hold him close until he could stand on his own once more.

"Oh, David, come up to bed." She sounded exhausted and he took his first good look at her. There were dark bags under her eyes, and her cheeks were stained with tears. "I'll be fine, in time. My heart just hurts. Thank you for finding me a new pair of reading glasses. Too bad they came right before I had another fight with Mary."

Dave rubbed her shoulders softly and followed her inside. Erin held out her hand to him, and he clasped it tightly, threading their fingers together. She led them upstairs and he saw that the covers were already pulled back and her trashcan was half-filled with used tissues. "What did she say to you this time?"

"That I'm an unfeeling bitch, and that I should go to Hell." The tears began to fall once more and he pulled her close to him, enveloping her in a tight hug. "She hates me, David. The others have tried to reconcile with me, have accepted the hand I held out in contrition, and she continues to rebuff me. I don't know what to do." Her words were interrupted by the ferocity of her tears, and all he could do was run her back gently as she sobbed against his chest.

When they had slowed a little, he pushed her away gently so that she would look at him. "Erin, would an unfeeling woman cry over something like this?" She shook her head. "And where's your faith?"

"Deep in my soul," she whispered, tightening her hand in his shirt. "It's stronger day by day as I walk through this minefield that's become my life."

"Wonderful words to hear, sweetheart." He leaned forward and kissed her forehead as he rubbed the tears from her cheeks. "Now, we are both exhausted and tomorrow is Saturday, so we can sleep in." She nodded and slipped the robe off her shoulders. Dave sucked in a shallow breath as he took in her nude body. He felt his balls tighten as her nipples hardened, reacting to the cool air of the bedroom.

"I like feeling your skin on mine, Dave. Join me?" He nodded and quickly fumbled with the buttons on his shirt, trying not to tear them off. Once his chest was bare, he worked on his pants, watching her recline on the bed, the tips of her fingers skimming her hip bone as she watched him. "Are you going to be all evening, David?"

He shook his head, finally shucking his boxers and tugging off his socks. "Good things come to those who wait, dearest Erin." She giggled lowly and held up her arm to him. Taking the invitation, he crawled into bed and pulled the covers up around them. Erin's arm fell around his waist, her hand splaying out across his back. Gently, he kissed her forehead once more and she snuggled even closer to him.

Taking a deep breath, he tried to think of things that would cool his ardor. "Rossi Jr. is waking up, Dave. I hate being such a cocktease."

"Don't ever let me hear you call yourself that again. You are the woman that I love, and if you need me to wait, I can wait until the seas run dry." Her smile wobbled and he kissed her, stopping the tears from falling, he hoped. "Now, go to sleep."

Erin nodded, resting her head on his chest as he turned onto his back. Possessively, her leg came between his and he could feel the heat radiating off her wet core. In that instant he realized that she was ready to go further, yet was exercising her self-control and trying to keep on her path to sobriety. "I love you," she whispered as she yawned and he rubbed her back gently as her breathing evened out. It didn't take long for him to follow her into slumber.

In the morning, he woke up first and sat up, tugging Erin up against his chest. She stirred a little, nuzzling her nose in his sparse chest hair. And then her lips pressed softly against his skin. He looked down into her stormy blue eyes and she closed her mouth, sucking on the flesh she touched. "Oh, god, Erin, don't stop that."

She nodded and dragged her lips down to one of his flat, dusky brown nipples. Her teeth scored the tender flesh and he hissed as he brought a hand up to her head, burying his fingers in her soft blonde hair. Then she was drawing the nipple between her lips, sucking and licking at the sensitive bit of skin. As she continued her sweet pursuit, he felt himself grow harder and harder. And then her hand was closing around his dick, stroking slowly. Dave bit his lip, trying to keep control, but the touch of her hand was too much and he lost his grip on the thin filament his control had become. Still, she stroked him, never picking up her maddeningly slow pace. Finally, her lips left his nipple and she lifted her face for a kiss.

He mashed his lips against hers bruisingly and she moaned into his mouth as she let go of his dick to bury her fingers in his hair, holding him there. Finally, though, they had to come up for air and he let go of her. "What was that?"

"The release you needed. Do you want to shower with me this morning?" She was panting and he felt her hardened nipples rub against his chest.

"That sounds wonderful."

"I know what you're thinking, Davie," she teased as she sat up, stretching. "You needed something more than a simple kiss to whet your appetite. I was fine doing this, I needed to do this, to prove to you that I do care, and I do want your release as much as I want my own." Bending, she kissed him quickly. "Better hurry before all the hot water is used up!"

She made her way into the master bath and stood in the doorway, smiling at him. He grinned in return and bolted off the bed, following after her. "Honey, am I joining you in the shower this morning?"

"Of course. I love it when you join me." She opened the door and stepped inside, looking at him expectantly. "I wish I didn't want to try out the one year rule. I think sex with you would be really amazing," she said as she turned on the hot water, letting it pour down on them.

As he lathered up a washcloth to use on her, he took a deep breath. "Is it a hard and fast rule that you have to wait so long to have sex?"

"No, and I'm already breaking it a little with this." She waved her hand in a circle to indicate them. "I mean, we're not even supposed to let our hearts get entangled. Though there are some creepy people in AA who tried to get me to hook up with them, back when I first started going to meetings."

His hand tightened around her waist and he saw her wince a little. "Sorry. It's just the thought of some skeevy guy hitting on you upsets me."

"It wasn't just men, Dave."

He raised his eyebrow and she nodded. "Well, do I need to start coming to those meetings to beat them off with a stick?"

She laughed lightly. "You're not my father, honey. You're my soon to be lover. Give me a couple more weeks to feel a little more balanced. Okay?"

"I will wait for you as long as it takes, I've told you that before." He leaned forward and kissed her gently, washing the soap off her body. "But I will never turn down sex with you. You were made to be worshipped."

He cupped her breast and gently ran his thumb over her nipple, watching it stiffen slightly. She made a delicious sound in the back of her throat and he felt free enough to continue on a little further, kissing down her elegant neck, licking softly at her clavicle, before continuing on to capture that pert peak between his lips. Her fingers closed around the back of his neck as he gently pushed her back against the wall to give her some support. "I'd love to say don't stop, Dave, but, oh god, there's not time and I don't want my first orgasm with you to be in the shower."

He nodded and pulled away from her, bringing them back under the water. They finished washing up and he stepped out onto the bath mat, grabbing towels for them. He wrapped one around his waist and then held out hers. She came forward and he bundled her up, bringing his chin to rest on top of her head. "What do you want to do today?"

"Breakfast, of course, and then I'd love to go outside and sit in the hammock and read while curled up against you. I know, so boring, but I want to relax in your arms. I'm sure that there's something here that you would enjoy flipping through for a few hours."

"That sounds utterly romantic, Erin." They dried off and he watched her dress in a pair of tight jeans and a simple blue blouse. He quickly pulled on something clean from his go bag and she led him downstairs.

"There's not much of a selection, I'm afraid. Alan took all of his books with him, so now you're stuck with history or historical fiction." She pulled out a thick book and he whistled lowly in admiration. "What? It's just a book about Christian mysticism. I find the subject utterly fascinating."

"You should talk to Reid. He would be your new best friend, given his mother's love of Margery Kempe and Julian of Norwich."

She smiled. "That would have to happen after Hell freezes over, Dave. They don't like me, remember?"

"Eventually, they will. I will show them how very perfect and sweet you are." She shook her head and kissed his cheek softly. "I take it you don't believe me."

"Not yet, at least. Give me time, and maybe I can start to open up to them." He nodded and reached around her to grab _Great Lakes Shipwrecks and Survivors_. "I never took you for a ship man."

"There may be hidden facets to me that you have yet to discover, Erin." He dropped a kiss on her cheek and then let her lead him outside. The hammock was one of those huge ones a person could get lost in and he grinned. "Let me help you in there," he said and she just shook her head, thrusting her book into his chest as she let him help her up. His hand lingered on her ass for just a beat too long and she turned to look at him, a mischievous smile dancing around her lips. "What? I like feeling up my girlfriend."

"Partner. I'm no longer in my twenties, love." She held out her hands and he gave her the books before climbing in the hammock next to her. It took them a moment to get comfortable and she plastered herself against his side, resting her head on his chest as she dove into her book.

It took him a little longer to find his stride, as he was distracted by the way she smelled, the way she felt, the little noises she made as she agreed with some point the author had made. He had the feeling that he was made for moments like these, and had been looking for the right partner ever since he had broken up with Carolyn. And it had only taken him twenty five years to wake up to the fact that it was Erin Strauss.


	5. Chapter 5

He shuddered once more as he stepped off the plane. This case had unnerved him on a deeper level than the others, given his faith. He had grown up with demons, his mother had told him stories of the Old Country and the deep beliefs she held, even as his father had scoffed at her superstition. As he grew older, he also scoffed outwardly, but inwardly he believed his mother to be right.

That was why he needed to be in Erin's arms. Dave was quiet the entire ride back to the FBI campus, feeling withdrawn and lost. The others weren't much more talkative, even Reid. It seemed as if the pervasive oppression of the case was weighing down on them all. He hung back from the group as they trudged from the parking garage to the elevators and noticed the slightly defeated air they all wore. Sighing, he stepped into the elevator with his team and rode up to the sixth floor.

Peeling off from the group, he headed to Erin's office. Helen looked up from her work, smiling at him. "She's on a call right now, but feel free to go on in. I'm sure she'll be happy to see you."

"Thanks, Helen." He went over to Erin's door and opened it a little, listening to her berate someone on the other end of the line. Easing himself inside, he closed the door behind him and took a seat in the chair in front of her desk.

Looking up at him, she smiled widely and held up one finger. He nodded, trying to smile back. The smile on her face slipped and she nodded. "Listen, I have to go, Sam. Make sure you close this case by tomorrow, and if you can't, come home." Hanging up the phone, she stared into his eyes, concern radiating off her. "David, whatever is the matter?"

"I just need you to hold me, Erin." She bit her lip and stood up, coming over to his side. Not even bothering to stand himself, he wrapped his arms around her legs, holding her tightly. "Could we head out?"

"Of course, just let me sign off on these reports. It'll only take a moment." She went back over to her side of the desk, bending over and signing her name with a flourish on the small stack of reports. "All right, we can go now." She pulled her purse out of her desk drawer and then came around to him once more.

"Will you drive? I don't trust myself behind the wheel right now."

"Okay." She held out her hand to him, and he clasped it, letting her lead him out to the elevators. As they waited, Aaron caught his eye and nodded, a wry smile on his face. The doors opened and they stepped inside.

"Aaron knows about us, Erin. I hope you don't mind."

"I suppose if anyone has to know right now, it should be him. Do you realize that we've been together for a month and a half? That time seems to have flown by so quickly."

"And when are we going to go public with our relationship? While I like the cloak and dagger routine, I want the others to know I'm with you."

"Perhaps in another month and a half? I want this to be a certain thing." Her hand tightened around his. "I've found myself looking forward to the time we spend together, and I don't want to introduce something that could interrupt that happiness just yet."

He found himself agreeing with her, stepping closer to her as the elevator doors closed. "I'm glad that you're happy, Erin." He could hear the weariness in his own voice and she let go of his hand to wrap her arm around his waist. Dave pulled her tightly to his side, caressing her back as she rubbed her face against his chest.

"We'll talk at home," she murmured as they stepped out into the parking garage. She wouldn't let go of his hand, and he was grateful for the close contact. She led him over to her car and he got in. The ride home was a blur to him, and he gladly accepted her help from the car. Together, they went up to her bedroom and she quickly stripped him down to his boxers before taking her own clothes off, leaving on her panties.

"Erin, it was so awful," he whispered as they crawled into the bed. She pulled the covers up around them before wrapping her body around his. "The children were completely and utterly destroyed by their mother's belief in demons and the devil, and the feeling of evil just hung over everything. I feel like the stench of it still stains my skin."

She pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder and he sighed. "You're home now, you stopped the boy before he could hurt anyone else."

"It doesn't feel that way, Erin. I know I don't usually have those gut feelings, but this time, I do. I feel as if this will never really be over, that this was a deep and fundamental evil. I'm at best a lapsed Catholic, but what we saw there is enough to convince me that the Devil still roams this earth."

Erin nodded and placed another soft kiss on his skin. "You can't do the job we do without believing in the very real existence of evil, in the absence of good." Plastering her body to his, she kissed the hollow of his throat and he groaned, grabbing hold of her ass and tugging her atop him. "But with evil comes the good in our lives. And you are my good. I hope that I'm your good." She bent and kissed his lips softly and he returned the kiss with fervor, bringing his arms up around her waist.

"You are fast becoming my everything, Erin," he said once they'd broken their kiss. "That's why I came to you as soon as I got home. I knew you'd know exactly what I needed." He kissed her again and she seemed to melt into him. "I love you."

"And I love you." Dave brought his hand up to play with her hair. "Does your fireplace work?"

"Uh huh. Why?"

"I sort of want to bring you downstairs and curl up with you in front of a roaring fire. And yes, I know that it's about a hundred out, but I can't seem to get warm." She looked up at him and smiled impishly, nodding. "Thank you." They kissed once more before he got up and pulled her to her feet. "I wish you had a bearskin rug, dearest. I hear they feel luxurious against your skin," he said as they made their way downstairs.

"That would mean one of us would have to hunt and kill a bear. And you know I barely pass my yearly qualifications to carry a gun, so that job would be left up to you. And I do not want you doing something that dangerous."

"Yet you send me out on the field week after week to face violent killers and other unsavory characters."

She shrugged, kneeling in front of the fireplace to make a fire. Once the flame was going strong, she turned to him, and he grinned sadly. Erin closed the distance between them, closing her arms around his neck. "It's your job. Even if I hate it, it is your job to go out there and hunt those who would do evil. You're my knight in slightly dented armor."

Gently, Dave brought them to the floor, spooning his body around hers. "Dented armor?"

"You've had to tilt at so much evil, that it couldn't help but touch you in some ways. You never fell to it, though. You always remained stalwart and true." She grasped his hand and brought it up to her breast, letting him cup the tender flesh. His thumb grazed across the taut nipple and she arched back into him, drawing in a deep breath through her nose. "I love it when you do that. You know, the one good thing about all this waiting is that my anticipation is running high."

"So is mine, love, so is mine." He kissed the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent. "I feel like sometimes I'm going to want to end it all." He had never admitted that to anyone else, and he wondered how Erin would react.

"That was why I started drinking, David. I wanted to just disappear into something, and then, well, look what happened to me. Promise me that you will never choose that option."

He kissed her cheek. "You have no worry of that, love. To do so would be a grave sin, and I would damn my soul." She nodded and turned in his arms, slinging her arm around his waist as she fitted a leg between his. "And now that I have you, I couldn't do that. I would never hurt you like that." She kissed his lips softly and he ran his hand down to her ass, cupping it and squeezing.

"I want you so badly, Dave. I want to completely give myself over to you, to feel you inside me, filling me. But the time has been so short." Her eyes grew luminous in the light cast off by the fire and he pulled her close, so close to him.

"The first thing that I want for you is to have a complete and full recovery."

"That would mean you would spend the rest of your life celibate, and you do not want that. There can never be a full recovery from alcoholism. Dr. Reid can tell you that. This is a long road through a dark forest, and at times I am going to get lost."

"We'll get lost together, I told you that before." He kissed her again. "Now, how long have you been sober?"

"Since I went into rehab in December."

"And this is now April. You've been sober for five months." A lazy smile crossed her face. "Don't you think you deserve a reward for making it this far without slipping? Don't I need a way to feel better?" And truthfully, being in her arms, he was feeling better, some of the stench fading away.

"I suppose you do. Here, in front of the fire?"

He nodded. "And what would my lady have me do?"

Erin's face flushed with embarrassment. "I want you to go down on me," she said in a rushed whisper, biting her lip nervously. "Alan, well, I, oh, I don't even have words that would not sound pathetic." She waved her hand dramatically as she rolled onto her back. "I like it when a man goes down on me."

"And I like to please my partner." He knelt over her, tugging her panties off as he captured lips in a searing kiss. She whimpered when he ran his thumb along her slit and her hips bucked a little. "You like that." She nodded. "Good."

Dave dragged his lips down her body, paying close, thorough attention to her breasts. From the little they'd done, he knew that she loved having her nipples sucked and nipped at. "Davie," she said breathlessly, bringing a hand up to his shoulder and squeezing delicately. "More."

He nodded and left her breasts, bringing his lips down to her navel, swirling his tongue there. She tightened her hand on his shoulder and he knew that she was getting close to the precipice of pleasure. Burying his face in her cunny, he quickly brought her to orgasm with his tongue. Dave loved how she tightened her thighs around his head, the high keening moan that sprang from her lips, the delicate pain that her nails digging into his shoulder brought. "You taste so good, love. This is just a sweet foretaste of what is to come."

She nodded, trying to catch her breath. "My reward was very sweet indeed. Come up here and put your arms around me." He nodded at her command and made his way up her body, placing soft kisses on her skin. "Are you feeling better now?"

"A little," he murmured as he closed his arms around her waist, pulling her close to him. "It'll take time, I know. But as long as you hold me, I'll be fine." She nodded and kissed him softly. "Now, what would you like for supper?"

"Surprise me, lover," she replied with a saucy grin and he laughed, kissing her once more.


	6. Chapter 6

"Did you really think I would find this funny, David?" Her voice was icy cold, and he knew that she was deeply offended. Shrugging, he tried to lean down for a kiss, but she stopped him, pushing his face away. "Seriously, where the fuck do you get off?"

"I thought it would amuse you…"

"Amuse me? A contract that would make me your slave? I'm not into the whole BDSM scene, and you know it. Try again." Erin's face was set in a furious frown and Dave was beginning to see just how large a gaffe he had made.

"I know that…"

"No, I don't think that you do. Alan thought that it would be okay to hurt me. I don't want to be in a relationship where pain is equal to pleasure. I love you, but I will not be your slave. I will not let you hurt me." Tears were rolling down her face and he could feel a wetness on his own face that told him he was crying as well.

"I don't know what to say except that I'm sorry." She nodded sharply and stood, going over to her window to stare outside. He approached her slowly, not wanting to spook her. Tenderly, cautiously, he rested his hand on her shoulder, and she turned into him, breaking down into heart-wrenching sobs. "I am so sorry, Erin."

Dave stroked her hair as she cried, struggling to get control of his own emotions. Her arms came to rest around his waist as her emotions poured out of her. "It was little things, at first. Like how I wore my makeup, or how short my skirts could be. I would always go and do the exact opposite, just to irk him. And then one evening, as we were getting ready to head out to another FBI function, I came down in a tight, bright red, dress that was shorter than my fingertips and very low-cut. He flew into a rage and hit me. I never saw it coming. And then he tore the dress from my body."

"Did he…?"

"No, no, I gave it up willingly enough, when I saw the look in his eyes."

Dave held her closer, rubbing her back. "That's not sex, then."

"But that is what I want it to be. Okay?"

"Okay, love." She nodded and then drew in a deep breath, stepping back from him to look into his eyes. "I love you."

A gentle smile tempered the look of sorrow on her face. "I love you, too. And I want to go home and cuddle. Please?"

"All you had to do was ask." He let go of her to go over to her desk and pull out her purse. Handing it to her, he linked arms with her, leading her out of the office. Helen had long since gone home, and most of the lights were off in the building, much to his relief.

"Did Ms. Garcia make it to Chicago all right?"

Dave looked down at her. "How do you know she came out to Chicago?"

"I sent her." She smiled then, a true smile, and he chuckled. "Oh, she thinks that one of you allowed her to go out there, but she's not the only one who has some hacking skills. You pick up things here and there, if you pay attention."

"Erin Strauss, you will never cease to amaze me." He kissed the side of her head as the doors to the elevator opened, and they stepped inside. She was still sniffling a little as she cuddled close to him. "I am going to take care of you this weekend, beloved, I promise."

She nodded against his chest, rubbing her nose in his shirt. "There's probably going to be a stain there, sorry," she whispered as he twirled a piece of hair around his fingers.

"Shirts were made to be washed." They fell silent as the elevator descended. When the doors opened, he led her over to his car, never letting go of her. She crawled into the passenger seat and buckled her belt, watching him the entire time. "Did that…incident make you want to disappear into alcohol?"

Erin nodded again, looking away from him. "That's when I started drinking, actually. And that was the night that Amanda was conceived."

Dave drew in a deep breath through his nose, uncertain of what to say to her at that moment. His own child had been created in love, and he could only imagine how she felt at having a child conceived in anger and hate. "No wonder you favored your son for so many years."

"Yes. And those are years I can never get back. I'm reaping what I sowed." He patted her shoulder a little and wished that he had a driver so that he could embrace her fully. Pushing his foot down on the pedal, he sped home and pulled into the garage.

She was silently weeping once more and he opened his arms to her. Erin fell into his embrace and he slung an arm under her knees, nestling her against his chest. Carefully he got them in the house and into the living room, settling on the sofa. "Let me in, Erin. Please."

"I don't know why I'm so upset, David. It just feels like this giant scab has been torn off my heart, letting all this pus and ooze come out to the surface. I want to feel loved and lovely once more, to know the tender embrace of someone who loves me."

"Would you let me make love with you? Would you feel comfortable with intimacy tonight?" He hoped she understood how serious he was, that he wanted to do nothing more than bring her the pleasure and love she deserved.

"I would love nothing more than, David. Take me up to your room." Slowly, he nodded and stood up, holding out his hand.

"I love you, Erin Strauss. Never, ever, forget that."

"I'm trying not to." They went upstairs and he stopped her in front of the bed. "David?"

"I want to undress you myself. That is an unparalleled pleasure in my life." She nodded slowly, letting her arms rest at her side. Reaching out, he slipped the jacket off her shoulders and then unzipped her skirt watching it puddle at her feet. "I love your legs, Erin. They seem to go on forever, especially when you wear those impossibly high heels." Kneeling, he ran his hands up and down her legs, massaging her calves.

Erin let out a soft moan and he could smell her sweet scent of arousal. "Umm, David. That feels wonderful." He nodded and began to travel up her body, cupping the firm globes of her ass and squeezing gently. "Yes," she hissed out, bending over him. Oh so carefully, he pushed her back and had her sit on the bed.

Still kneeling, he crept between her legs and began to undo the buttons on her blouse. Leaning forward, he placed soft kisses on the skin he bared. All the while, he could feel himself growing harder, wanting to sink in the sweet oblivion that she would offer him. Finally, her blouse joined the pile of clothes and then he was unhooking her bra, drawing it slowly off her shoulders. "I have waited so long for this moment, Erin. And it is impossibly sweeter than I could have ever imagined."

"I've been waiting, too. Will you kiss me once more? I love your kisses." He looked up into her eyes and saw that she was crying once more. Reaching up, he brushed those precious tears away, bringing his fingers to his lips. She smiled a little at the tender gesture before placing her hands on his face, letting him capture her lips in a tender kiss.

"These will be the kisses that I will live for, Erin," he murmured against her lips, gently pushing her back on the bed. He covered her body with his, continuing to kiss her. Erin's hands began to work at the fastenings of his clothes, pulling and tugging until he was as naked as she was. "I want to give you so much pleasure, my sweet. So much love."

"So do I," she replied, running her nails down his back as he tweaked her nipple before placing a soft kiss on it. "Oh, more of that, please."

Chuckling, he rubbed his face between her breasts, enjoying the tug of her hands on his hair, the way she cried out. "I love those sounds you make, Erin. They drive me on." She only moaned as he captured the stiffened peak between his lips, sucking and tugging with abandon. The move that really seemed to drive her crazy, though, was when he gently scored her nipple with his teeth. Her legs closed around his waist, pulling him tight to her body, and he almost felt his control slip.

While still kissing and suckling at her breasts, he shucked his boxers off his legs and then pulled her panties off. He could feel the heat she was giving off, and let out a groan of pure pleasure. "Oh, David, I'm so, I'm so, more." Her words were quickly becoming incoherent and he knew that they would be coming together shortly.

Slowly, he positioned himself at her entrance, savoring the feel of her around him as he sank into her. For the first time since Carolyn, he understood why the Church described loving as two flesh becoming one, as he couldn't seem to fathom anymore where he ended and where Erin began. It was the perfection he had been seeking and he let her take the lead, showing him what pace she wanted.

His orgasm came on the heels of hers, much too quickly for his liking, and he collapsed atop her, breathing heavily. "Thank you," he whispered in her ear as he stroked her hair gently.

She nodded, tears in her eyes. "That was perfect, David. Absolutely perfect." The first sob tore from her throat and he looked at her in concern. "These are happy tears, I promise, beloved." Erin wrapped her arms around his waist, nestling closer to him.

"Care to tell me what is going on in that brain of yours?"

She nodded, taking a deep breath. "You've been my rock since I returned from rehab. I wasn't expecting that. You told me that we'd get lost together, and we have. We've fought, we've made up, and you still want to be by my side. I don't deserve you, David, and yet, here you are in my bed, loving me, holding me, and I don't want to wake up from this dream. I feel like I am finally home, here in your arms."

"And I feel like I'm home, too." He kissed her, possessively this time, and she returned the kiss with the same force, as if trying to imprint herself on him. "I'm not good at the marriage thing."

"Neither am I."

He ran his thumb along her cheekbone as he stared into her eyes. "But I want to be a permanent fixture in your life. If you'll have me."

"I want the same thing. Why couldn't we have been on the same page years ago?"

"Because we were meant for this time. Who we became helps shape how we love now." He kissed her again. "And if we weren't who we were, then I wouldn't be such a rock for you. I love you."

"I love you." She took a deep breath. "We'll have to keep this a secret from your team. I'm not quite ready to be out at work, especially with your reputation." She smiled impishly at him. "And I want to keep you for myself, I don't want to share our relationship."

"I totally understand. The team can be a bit overwhelming at times." He turned on his side, pulling her with him. She turned over and spooned back against him, her pert ass fitting in the curve of his body perfectly. "But as long as you're with me, we'll continue to get lost together."

"Forever." The word had never sounded as beautiful to him as it did in that moment, falling from her lips. Nodding, he placed a soft kiss on her shoulder before letting his eyes close, sleep stealing over him as he lay contentedly with the woman he loved.


	7. Chapter 7

The weekend had been a whirlwind of activity, what with dealing with the bank heist and then the details of arranging Jen's wedding. Dave had barely had a moment alone with his Erin from the moment they'd parted at the hotel. It had been good to get away and be with her, he thought as he watched her dance with Hotch.

Penelope came up to him, a knowing smile on her face. "Care to dance, my romantic Italian stallion?"

"With you? Anytime." He gathered her up in his arms and led her out onto the dance floor. "So, spill. I know you have something on your mind, Kitten."

"How long have you been with Strauss? I can tell it's been months, because you look at her with eyes in love. When did things change between you?"

He sighed, knowing the cat was officially out of the bag. "Things changed when she came back to us. Rehab did a number on her, and I've been helping her to pick up the pieces. Somewhere along the way…"

"You fell for each other. Oh my gosh, that is so romantic! I'm still waiting for my love like that. Obviously it wasn't Kevin," she said softly as she looked over at where her ex and his date were dancing. "I think you're good for her. Reid and I saw her coming out of the hotel and she looked like very satisfied."

Despite his age and experience, he found himself blushing at her frank statement and she giggled maddeningly. "And you, my dear, are not to breathe one word of this to anyone else. My Erin wants to keep things under wraps, since someone on the team has a big mouth."

She gasped a little before smacking his shoulder. "I'll have you know that I am very good at keeping secrets. Even if they are adorable ones." He chuckled a little at her statement, and when the song was over, he let her go, stepping back over to his girlfriend's side.

"She knows, doesn't she?" were the first words out of Erin's mouth as they began to dance.

"Yeah. Seems we weren't discreet enough at the hotel. There was that convention there, and she and Reid went to it. I tried to distract them long enough for you to get away, but it must not have worked. I've sworn her to secrecy."

She smiled sweetly up at him. "And we cannot get on her bad side. I've heard stories about her powers with a computer." Dave laughed lightly as he whirled her around his patio. The dim lights only seemed to highlight the sparkle in her eyes, and he pulled her closer to him.

"May I cut in here?" They both looked up at Morgan, and she nodded, her smile wobbling a little as she stepped into his arms. She had told Dave about how they had made the first tentative steps towards respect and friendship, and he was so pleased to finally have the start of true harmony in the team.

Emily came up to him and held out her hand. He gently clasped it and began to dance with her. "So, when are you telling the team that you took the job at Interpol?"

She stiffened with shock for a few beats and he just smiled at her. "How did you figure that out?"

"I have connections, Emily."

"Don't Emily me, Dave. This will probably be our last time together, after all. And I think most of them know already. I'm the Debbie Downer of the happy occasion." She sighed. "I always seem to bring others down."

Dave felt himself choke up a little as he tugged the woman close to his chest. He rubbed her back softly as he tried to keep control on his emotions. "Oh, Emily, you just need to let people in a little more, to trust us. And now we don't get that chance." He kissed her forehead lightly and caught Erin's eye. She nodded to him and he smiled gratefully as they continued to dance.

Finally, JJ and Penelope stole Emily away and Erin ended up back in his arms. "I love your heart, David," she murmured in his ear. "How much longer before we can be together?"

"Just another hour. Jen's mom is taking Henry for the night, and the limo will be here in thirty minutes to see the two lovebirds off to their honeymoon suite. If you're bored, you could go up and wait for me in our room?"

She arched an eyebrow. "I could do that. And just so you know what you're missing, I'm wearing a thong beneath this dress. That sweet baby blue one you picked out for me from Victoria's Secret."

"And are you wearing the matching bra?" he asked and was rewarded with a sharp nod. "Do not take them off before I join you."

"Or you'll what?" she teased.

"Or I'll think twice about our weekend getaway next month."

She pouted a little before smiling sunnily at him. "I'll see you in twenty." Sashaying away from him, she deliberately let her hips swing, knowing full well that he was watching her. And really, over the course of their relationship, he'd found himself unable to keep from watching her, memorizing her every curve and line, falling in love with her more and more with each facet she revealed to him.

"She's lucky to have you," Aaron said as he handed him a glass of champagne. "What are you waiting for?"

"I'm the lucky bastard, Hotch. And I'm waiting for all of you to leave. We like to keep things private." Hotch nodded a little and then went over to Beth, whispering in her ear. She glanced at him, a mischievous smile curving her lips as she nodded. Taking Jack's hand, Aaron led his son and girlfriend over to JJ and Will, obviously saying goodbye to the happy couple.

This seemed to be the signal that everyone else needed, as in pairs they left until it was just the LaMontagnes and JJ's mother. "The limo is going to be here shortly," he said as he approached them. "Do you need anything else?"

"No, I think we're all set here, Dave. Thank you again for throwing this together on such short notice. You made my wife and me so happy." Will kissed JJ's forehead tenderly and Dave just nodded.

"I'm going to head upstairs then. This has been a rather tiring few days."

"And you have a formidable woman waiting for you up in your bedroom," JJ replied, a small smirk dancing around her lips.

"Dammit, I have got to stop spending so much time around all of you. How do you know that, Jen?"

"It was obvious when you danced with her. Anyone in love can see the look of love in another's eyes. And don't worry, we can keep your secret. It's going to be the best kept one in the BAU."

"I think you mean worst, Jen." Leaning forward, he kissed her cheek softly before slipping inside his home and hurrying up the stairs. From a few feet away, he could hear his lover singing an Italian love song, one that he'd been teaching her over the last few weeks. "You sound amazing, Erin."

"I'm practicing for the one I love. I want to sound perfect for him." She smiled as she pulled back the covers, revealing the fact that she was wearing only the bra and panty set. He quickly stripped and stalked over to her, holding out his hand.

Erin clasped it and let him tug her out of bed and against his body. Slowly, he ran his hands down her back to cup her ass, pulling her even closer. "So, what would you say to against the wall tonight?"

"I would say that that sounds absolutely wonderful, but you're going to have to hold on tightly. Remember last time we tried that?"

He did, much to his chagrin. He'd lost his grip on Erin as she climaxed and she had banged her head hard against the wall. Both had taken the next day off from work, and he had made her stay in bed the whole day, waiting on her hand and foot. "This will be nothing like that, I promise. This time I'm not going to let you go."

"Then what are you waiting for?" she purred, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him possessively.

"I have no idea," he murmured against her lips. Unclasping the bra, he tugged it from her arms before skimming her panties down her legs, letting her shimmy the rest of the way out of them. Carefully, he maneuvered them back against the wall and then lifted one of Erin's leg, positioning it at his waist before he sank into her willing, warm, body.

Erin lifted her other leg, wrapping them around his waist as he began to thrust in and out of her. She moaned lowly as he slowly kept his pace, not wanting to do anything that might cause him to drop her or hurt her once again. "David!" she screamed as she climaxed, her back bowing before she collapsed forward, hanging on to him tightly as he got them over to the bed.

"I love you, so very much, Erin Strauss."

"And I love you, David Rossi, so very, very, much." As they positioned themselves on the bed, she leaned in to kiss his collarbone. "I don't want to go to sleep, I'm so happy. This doesn't even make any sense. I shouldn't have thrown caution to the wind, and yet I did. And we are so happy."

"You let yourself be free, and trusted me." He kissed the top of her head. "I have something for you, beloved."

She turned her head up to look at him. "What?"

"One second." He turned slightly and pulled open the drawer, taking out a small, slim, box. "Here. Open this."

Erin took it from his hands and opened it, gasping in pleasure. "Oh my god, David. This is too much. Thank you!" She turned and threw her arms around him, kissing him soundly. "Put it on me, please."

She held out the sapphire and pearl necklace he'd gotten her, her eyes sparkling as she grinned. "With pleasure, Erin." Unclasping the necklace, he draped it around her neck, watching how it was the perfect length to nestle between her breasts. He placed a soft kiss on her shoulder and then ran his hand down to her breast, cupping it gently before pinching the stiffened nipple.

"Umm, David, I'm still ready for you," she murmured, reaching around to close her hand around his dick, stroking it lazily. "Will it take very long to get you ready for me?" The way she said those words caused him to harden in her hand and she chuckled lowly. "I guess not." Erin pushed him back on the bed and positioned herself over him, fitting herself on him.

"Are you going to ride me, Erin? Am I your stallion?" He knew that those words would turn her on, and she swiveled her hips just so, sending a bolt of pleasure through him. "That's what I love." She smirked and set a fast pace for them, a fine sheen of sweat breaking out on her body as they both strove to find their pleasure.

The orgasm that swept over Erin was something beautiful to watch and he closed his arms around her as she collapsed on top of him. "I'm so glad that we got lost together, David."

"I am, too, Erin. I am, too." He kissed her once more and pulled the covers up around their bodies, feeling her drift off to sleep in his arms. He knew that he would never be letting her go. Placing another soft kiss on her shoulder, he fell asleep himself, knowing that she would be there come the morning.


End file.
